the 36th week

I had my NST (non-stress test) and doctor's appointment today. The NST went well. As long as I continue to have low amniotic fluid, I'll have to continue to have NSTs weekly. I had my internal exam today and the doctor says that my cervix is like a rock - no dilation, and no effacement. Ugh. She predicts that I will probably not go into labor on my own. At least, not soon enough for the baby to be a size that I can actually birth! I asked the doctor if she'll induce me by August 5th, and she said no. Most likely, if I haven't gone into labor on my own by August 12th, I'll be induced then. Not a bad birthday - Baby B will share Sadie's birthday! Of course, Sadie will have three years on her and show her who is boss around here. Lord knows it's not me or the hub!

So, I'm not really any closer to knowing when this baby is coming. And I have to be okay with that because I don't get to choose when she gets here. While I would love for my family to be present when she is born, that may not turn out how it happens, and I can't require my "perfect" birth to include them. Because if my family can't be here, it can't be a disappointment that affects how I feel about the birth in whole. So, I have decided that if they make it, if the stars (and airline schedules) align, and everyone shows up before Baby B does, then I will be relieved and happy, but it is no longer a requirement for me.

On Thursday we have another ultrasound to check on the low amniotic fluid. If the fluid is below 6 cm (it is at 8.5 now), then I will have an emergency induction. If the fluid is still at 8.5 cm, then I will continue with the NSTs. If the fluid is better than before, I no longer have to go for NSTs. We'll also get another check on her size.

Interestingly enough, after talking with my sister, it turns out her first pregnancy went this same way. So much in common here: she had her gestational diabetes under control, the baby's head was low and against the cervix, she had a rock-hard cervix the entire time, and she had to get induced. Our doctors even said the same thing: "Your body does not want to give up this baby." So my fear is that if I go too long, I, like my sister, will have a 9 pound, 7 ounce baby. Yikes!