the thing is....

I do love my doctor, Dr. Aliff. She is personable and easy to get along with and doesn't make me feel stupid when I ask questions I should know the answers to. BUT, I don't like her office staff. Ugh. And I really didn't like a certain "Sabrina" who called me on Friday at 3:38 p.m. to tell me that they did not have an ultrasound tech available on Monday. Really? You really only found this out at 3:38 on Friday, the last business day before the ultrasound I scheduled a month ago? And this news applies to the ultrasound that tells me if my baby is healthy, developing correctly, and provides me some guidance as to pink or blue clothes?

Now, I automatically responded "no." As in, "no, you'll find an ultrasound tech, or get me a doctor who knows how to work the stupid machine, or ruin someone else's day because come Monday at 1:00 p.m. there will be cold jelly on my stomach and some strip mall ultrasound school graduate dragging a piece of plastic and pointing out things like the eyes, the hands, and the pelvic region." So she tells me that they are trying to get me in with another doctor's office, but that the other office is closed. Huh? It's now 3:40 p.m. on a Friday afternoon. What office is closed? Aren't 9:00 a.m. to 5:00 p.m. known as "business hours" for a reason? I'm certain there's an emergency number Sabrina could be calling, and apparently she doesn't consider the ultrasound I've patiently waited for to be an "emergency."

Now the clincher - Sabrina will call me Monday morning to let me know. So I have to go to court Monday morning, with my cell phone on, in the hopes that the office will in fact call me. But when I got my pregnancy test done there, they still hadn't called me with the results 6 hours after they said they would, and I finally had to call them. So, forgive me Sabrina, if I don't believe you when you say you will call me Monday morning. Sure, maybe it could easily be rescheduled, except that Josh and I are leaving on Tuesday morning at 6:55 a.m. to go to Oklahoma City, and we won't return until Saturday. So, the earliest I could get in would be another whole week. And I just can't stand it. I'm not a patient person to begin with, so Sabrina better get her act together and find me an ultrasound tech now.

the 19th week

Here I am at 19 weeks. I have now discovered what heartburn is! Luckily, I didn't really encounter it much before. Maybe because I don't do spicy foods and grew up on mostly bland food. Ponderosa was my favorite restaurant as a child. I won't get near it now. But the belly is still growing, though now it is morphing into the watermelon I love to eat. I gave in and bought a body pillow, which Sadie hates because now she can't snuggle up to my stomach and dominate the order of the bed anymore. And I feel good, though I still get tired easily and my chest-region is very sore.

craving of the week

Admittedly, I ate these before I became pregnant. But I never bought an entire box of them - only one at a time, sporadically. But there was something about that box of Little Debbie Strawberry Shortcake Rolls that I couldn't resist in the bread aisle at Wal-Mart. Did I endure the hub's jokes about chemicals all the way to the dairy section? Yes. Did I eat one when I got in the car? Yes. Did I eat another when I got home? Hell yes. You must understand, I've craved fruit forever now. But these contain no fruit. And the dog, who will eat poop in the yard, won't eat these. So wrong, but so right.

spring has sprung

My in-laws sent us some baby stuff not so long ago.  We weren't expecting anything, but I always check out on the front porch since we use the garage almost exclusively.  Really, if something was shipped to us, it could be weeks until it was discovered, so I've taken to peeking out the blinds to check.  

The box was filled with awesome baby goodness!  It contained some old baby things of the hub - his clothes, baby spoons, and sad monkey doll.  

I love how the sad monkey doll has tears!  And yes, that's Sadie's paw in the picture, as I'm pretty sure she wants to steal sad monkey doll and make him her very own.  

Also, the hub's grandmother crochets.  Predicting years ago that the hub and I would have a girl at some point, or a very feminine little boy*, she made these beautiful dress and booties and cape and booties. I have fallen in love with them and am very close to mandating that all of Baby B's clothes be handmade by grandma.  

And they also included some baby blankets!  Sandra (the hub's mom) made some, some belonged to the hub as a baby, and some the hub's grandma made.  They are stunning - crocheted, quilted, soft as nothing else.  And I have serious doubts about allowing a baby to use any of them, lest Baby B do something to or on the blanket that renders it soiled.  I'm imagining these blankets ending up on Antiques Road Show in 200 years with some appraiser saying, "Such intricate work!  I'd guess from the late 1990s or early 2000s.  I'd insure the blankets for $20,000.  Each."

Not all of the items are girly - there is a very cute cowboy blanket as well, and some of the hub's overalls that make me melt.  The idea that the hub was once a little baby is somewhat disorienting, as I don't think we've ever really looked at each other as once babies.  

And finally, I have decided that the baby will need books and I have started the collection.  Yes, I know that Baby B won't be able to read for many years, but I always liked having books read to me as a child so maybe my kid will too.  

You should know that the closest bookstore to me is 20 miles away.  It's a Borders Express, not even a real full Borders.  (Perhaps this is indicative of the horrible literacy and drop-out rates of WV? Just saying...) But it has a great children's section, and I set off to find some books.  Here's what I ended up with at the counter:

The teenager behind the counter escaped his weed-induced coma for 10 seconds to ring me up.  He checked out the books and said, "Wow.  Only the three best children's books ever written."  I admit, I was proud.  I looked at the hub with a glow and it stayed with me all the way home.  

* we find out the sex on March 30th!

the heartbeat

I have now figured out how to post videos, but the tricky thing was working with this wav file I got at my last doctor's visit. You guys know that I left myself a voicemail of the baby's heartbeat, and I have beat youtube* at its own game and made the wav file into a movie! Well, not really a movie so much as sound and a picture. But I am posting it below in all my technology glory to share. 

*youtube is annoying me right now and I have had to use the blogger video upload instead.

this whole pregnancy thang

My pregnancy books pretty much tell me what to expect from week to week. But I must admit, there are some changes no one warns you about. There are some occurrences that no one mentions may or may not happen during your pregnancy. Some of these things have definitely taken me by surprise and I've been forced to ask people, mainly Jessica, "Is this normal?" Turns out most of it is, and has likely happened to other people, but we're just not talking about it. So I've decided that I'm going to. You know, talk about it.

1. Who knew you can't sleep on your back after 14 weeks? I'm not normally a back sleeper - I prefer the half-side half-tummy with one leg up crane-like sleeping position. But you know how you don't miss something until it's gone? That's me with the back sleeping. And in truth I'll sometimes catch myself on my back and wonder what the big deal is. It's not like there's suddenly some horrific pain that alerts me to get off of my back. Not that back sleeping would help with my congestion, which leads me to...

2. Sinus issues. Ugh. I had no idea that come week 8 the bloody boogers would show up. I couldn't stop producing boogers, and when everyone around me not-so-discreetly started rubbing their own noses, I knew my overflow was showing up for my colleagues to see. I almost became paranoid that I had constant BIVs (booger in view). And now the congestion just travels down my throat all night. I've woken up just to be sick to my stomach. As well, I've woken up and realized that one eye is swollen because my sinuses are all messed up. Apparently, according to the experts, this has something to do with hormones. I don't need specifics. I just need to know how to wear my bite guard when I have so much congestion I can't breathe.

3. One question keeps popping up. Inevitably gender comes up. No, I don't know what I'm having. And if you've ever met me and Josh, you know that we're going to find out the gender because not knowing is not an option. I need to plan people. But the question that irks me is "do you have a preference?" Doesn't everyone? Even if the preference isn't overwhelming, doesn't everyone care at least 51% in one direction? And how do I admit what it is when I might be having the opposite gender?

4. The body smells are really getting to me. Yes, I can smell better than a blood hound. Thank the pregnancy and the lack of cigarette smoke numbing out my sense of smell. But I've noticed a smell I can't get rid of. Jessica says it is normal, so I will share. My boobs smell like sweet musty oatmeal. I can't make this up. Maybe because my boobs have doubled in size, or because I now sweat all night regardless of clothing or blankets, but I can't shake the smell. And it doesn't appear anyone else can smell it, though I've only asked the hub and he says he can't. It seems to go well with the new case of chest acne.

5. My belly. Yes, I'm almost 18 weeks. No, I'm not having twins. And I need people to stop being so surprised when they ask how much I've gained (really bad question in general) and I tell them 1 pound. Yes, it has been verified by my doctor. One singular pound. Yes, I've got a poking out belly. That's the baby fool.

That's all I've got so far. Please feel free to share your own "is that normal?" moments!

the 17th week

I had a doctor's appointment today, and as far as doctor's appointments go it was set up to be pretty uneventful. This was the blood test appointment, where I get to pay Lab Corp $200 to tell me if my kid has Down's Syndrome, and they get to be wrong 20% of the time. Some people told me not to bother with this test, but I pretty much go with the flow and if my doctor wants me to get it, I'll get it. Besides, even if a false positive sprang up, I wouldn't be mad. I'd probably just be appreciative that they then had to check everything out even that much more closely.

I had a "genius" moment last night before falling asleep concerning the heartbeat. See, we have a digital recorder somewhere in this house, but of course the only time it ever serves a function I can't find it. So, I really want to record the heartbeat, and I was trying to think of alternatives. I was all set to go in with my blackberry and record a voice note. However, I did wonder about the distortion of later trying to record it to the computer. Aha! We have vonage! Whenever we get a voicemail, it sends the voicemail message to Josh's email as a wav file. And Dr. Aliff saw no problem in letting me leave a voicemail message to myself of my baby's heartbeat.

But the doppler machine they normally use had interference from the cell phone - it's always something around here! So, being the awesome doctor she is (I'm assuming from our one meeting), she dragged in the sonogram machine and got the heartbeat from there. Now, the only sonogram/ultrasound I've ever gotten was at 8 weeks and the baby was really just a glorified tadpole at that point. But, these pictures were incredible. I was in love! The baby was moving around so much - punching its little arms and then laying them on either side of its head. I saw the little skeleton bones of the hands and feet, saw the eyes and mouth, and saw that the baby looks as my baby books say it should. Whew! And Dr. Aliff asked me if we were finding out the sex and I said yes and she said she knew what it was. But of course I told Josh not to bother with this appointment since it was only a blood test, so I told her we'd wait until the big tour o'uterus in 3 weeks so we could be told together.

The funny thing is, Josh and I had a conversation about hermaphrodites last night. A "what if" series that ended with the possibility that you might have to choose your child's gender and how the experts say to wait and see what develops and how hard that must be as a parent for someone to ask "boy or girl?" and you to respond "wish we knew." So my big relief was that if Dr. Aliff knew what it was, and wasn't calling in the specialists, then I'm pretty sure that it's one OR the other. I need to stop watching TLC specials!

So, here's me today, at 17 weeks. Gender 101 set for March 30th at 1:00 p.m.!!! And of course also the check of the major organs, spine, bones, etc. Also, I felt the baby for the first time last Thursday, and again tonight, so after the big sonogram in 3 weeks I may finally believe that there's a baby in there and that it is healthy and perfect.

the girl

I remember when the hub and I were considering getting a dog. We had just gotten married and were in the process of looking for our first house. I called a boston terrier breeder in Ohio, bracing myself that they wouldn't have any puppies available. But they did. And on that Tuesday evening we drove to the middle of Ohio and found Sadie, her sister, and her brother. An older couple had already snagged Sadie's sister. And Sadie's brother peed on the floor and was biting, so he was out. And Sadie was just so cute and cuddly, we snapped her up, whipped out the checkbook, and drove the three hours home. We adjusted to her, the needs of a puppy, whining at 3:00 am to go outside, and paying vet bills. All things, I realize, we will need to adjust to when the baby comes. So many new things - waking and sleeping hours not dictated by work or my own desire, money spent on diapers, food, supplies, clothes, baby furniture, doctor, the delivery fees - all things not budgeted for now, and so much more. And I know, this is a baby, and that is a dog, and yes we have been spoiled to leave Sadie at home in her play yard, and now we will either need to take the baby to the store, and load up a diaper bag and stroller and bjorn, or one of us gets to stay home and the other gets to go to Wal-Mart. Alone.

So, here're some pictures of my first baby, not first-born. She will have as many adjustments as us come August, and I hate it because I can't explain it to her in words. And she won't know why - why she can't take up the entire bed sleeping, or get to play whenever she wants, or why I forgot to buy her food because my brain is in a fog. Good thing dogs get over it quickly with a belly rub and chewstick!

the issue

I just saw a commercial for HDTV's. Really? Is there no longer a difference between "more than one" and "possessiveness"? HDTV's = the HDTV owns something. HDTVs = more than one HDTV. This issue will never cease to bother me. My poor unborn kid will never live it down if this mistake creeps into my house. Of course, its (not it's) teacher will probably thank me. Or not know the difference herself.

Enough whining....doctor's appointment in one week. Then the scheduled sonogram that takes two hours and we finally learn the gender of "it." I can't wait!

The Lotto

i hate checking my lotto tickets.  hate it.  i have fantasized about how i would use the money, how i'd give my notice to work and never work again, how i'd keep my house less than 3500 square feet so it wasn't a chore to keep it clean.  yeah, i've put thought into this.  i'd pay off my sister's mortgage, i'd buy her a Tahoe, the hub and i would buy a boat and live by the water.  the fantasy goes on and on, hardly ever changing.  and for a second before i check those numbers, it could all really happen.  

then you check and don't recognize your numbers, and there's some headline that some old man in delaware won, and it's over.  I get random numbers because i'm too lazy to play my own and fill out the form.  i get the numbers on separate tickets, or else i end up with 5 sets of numbers that look very similar to each other.  i like to make it spontaneous;  "oh, let's stop at the speedway and get a ticket!"  the closer to wednesday or saturday night the better.  it seems that when winning the lotto, it should be something along the lines of, "oh, i just stopped for an icee and a twix and i figured that if i don't play, i can't win, and i did buy a ticket full of random numbers and WON!"  perhaps the truth ("i left dinner half-cooked and sped up to the gas station where i impatiently waited in line, just to get a look from the cashier that pissed me off, and i stuffed the tickets into my purse, and waited to win as if it was owed to me") just doesn't look as nice in the spotlight of the tv cameras.  

the great thing about the lotto is that you don't have to deserve it.  it's also the worst thing about the lotto.  many a moron has ended up on a TLC cautionary tale of how the winner, years later, lives in a van after bad "investment choices."  and i live in the state where the biggest lotto winner couldn't keep from having hundreds of thousands of dollars stolen from his truck while he was in the strip club.  multiple times.  so, i just lean back, and tell myself, "wouldn't be me.  i'd spend the money wisely.  i'd be smart about the whole process.  but i don't know for sure because i don't win things.  raffles, silent auctions, lotto - i don't win.  so, even though i didn't win last night's drawing, there's always wednesday...