sew easy

After sewing two dresses (the first being the brown paisley, and the second being this blue and green one which Sadie seems to approve of or at least want to eat)...



I decided to try something new. But, not one to try and learn new things all the time, I stuck to what I was good at and just tweaked it. I mean, it took me three hours to make the first dress. I couldn't just throw away those hard-earned skills. So, I decided to shorten the dress and make a shirt! With pockets! And contrasting pockets and sleeves! Apparently this is super-exciting to me as I am over-using my exclamation point! And did I mention the pink ric rac around the pockets?



Britton saw it after her nap and snagged the shirt as her own. You can see it dangerously close to her snack and sippy cup, and whatever leftover crumbs from breakfast were hovering. But she was so dang happy about it.



Modeling her new shirt for Daddy. Isn't this the cutest?

changes to access

Since I started this blog, I have always made it available to the public, so to speak. I didn't set up any security parameters or limitations, hoping to include myself in the wide web of "mommy blogs." In effect, creating a forum to share with family, friends, and strangers who happened upon it my mundane and not-so-mundane life with child.

But I am becoming increasingly aware that this mindset might be naive. I want to believe everyone is good, that nobody would use such a forum to satisfy their own distorted agenda. And I don't believe that my tales and photos of Britton have done anything but illustrate what my life has become because of her. Admittedly, I never use our last name, my husband's name, my place of work, Britton's daycare, or the city in which we live. But really, is that enough?

I don't want to stop blogging altogether, as I hope this will become a memory book of sorts for Britton, a chance to reflect back on a time she will never remember - complete with pictures and stories. I, like most people, like to remember only the positive stuff, and I hope this memoir will paint a picture of how incredibly our lives changed by becoming parents, for the better. And yes, I include the negative aspects of life as well, because when I reached my darkest moments, it was other mother's blogs (those I knew and those I did not) that pulled me out, telling me I wasn't alone.

So, in an effort to be protective of the one person in my family that cannot protect herself, I have changed the settings of the blog to only allow those in who are invited. Unfortunately, I do not have email addresses for all those people who enjoy the blog. So if you would like to continue to have access, please email me (unless you as well have a blog - then you're automatically allowed as a fellow author).

I'm going to give this a little time to see if the changes are for the better. I may need to tweak the settings, so please bare with me. And, as always, thank you for sharing my family with yours.

sweetened, with extra lemon

Grandma and Grandpa have replaced the blood in their veins with iced tea. I exaggerate, but not by much. In fact, every time they come over to our house, they make iced tea. Using the iced tea maker they bought us. And I'm all for people drinking what they like, and I'm known to indulge in a little iced tea (sweetened, extra lemon) on occasion. I just crack up when I see Grandpa with a Tervis glass, filled to the brim with ice and iced tea because as long as I have known him, I have never seen him drink a glass of water. Iced tea and Coke Classic only. And Britton is catching this iced tea bug from them, whimpering for sips out of the glasses filled with ice and tea. We all oblige, as this southern staple is here to stay in our house.

Is that a fresh pitcher?



Britton shows the gravity of her addiction...



Iced tea smile...



Does anyone but me notice that her outfit is the quintessential "Cammy" outfit? Not that my mom dresses in mismatched prints, but she had no problem with me and my sister "displaying our individuality and creativity" through our clothing. Seriously, for most of our childhood we no doubt looked like color-blind ragamuffins. It was fantastic.

creative endeavors

Britton has been feeling her inner Picasso in the form of chalk drawings. And while she has graced the patio floor with her artwork, she has been aiming higher. Nothing is safe outside, including any clothing I may be wearing at the time. Since it's chalk, you can't get mad because it just washes off. And it's such a hoot to watch her get really into it. What has she been coloring lately?

The smoker...


The grill...


The column and her camper chair...


The chaise lounge cushion...


And in other artistic news, her are pictures of Britton in the dress I made her! Somehow, the last dress I made her ended up bigger than this one, so we'll have to wait until she grows into it. Grandma and I are tackling a peasant shirt (with pockets!) next.

homemade

There's just something about a homemade item that makes me smile. Not crappy homemade items, like a dryer lint sponge or a necklace made out of used drinking straws, but items made with care. For instance, when Britton got her tubes in her ears, guess what showed up in the mail from my niece and nephew? Homemade cards...

Caroline's


Garrett's


They were fantastic! And Britton loved the drawings and having us read them to her. Yes, some of it is that it takes more time, takes more effort, takes more thought, but mostly it is that someone must really care to go through all that trouble. In today's world, when we're so slammed with work because the bad economy means less workers and more to prove, we're left with less time. Add on errands, household chores, making dinner, getting enough sleep, and we're all stretched too thin. Why is fast food so popular? Not because it tastes good, but because it is fast and easy. Why do we online shop? Because it's faster than going to the mall. Nowadays we live further from work, further from family, and time just gets used up.

I was cruising Etsy, as I do every now and then, and came across some peasant dresses. They were about $30 a piece, which isn't really so bad a price for a dress. But one shop was selling the pattern for $7.50. And I thought back to my pre-teen years of sewing lessons and figured I could pull it off. With a little help of course, so I got Grandma in on my plan.

Three hours later, I had a dress!




Yes, in three hours I could have gone to the mall and bought Britton a dress. I know that. But this is a dress I made for her. And the next one won't take three hours, and every dress after that will get easier. More dresses? Oh yes - check out the fabrics...



Like Garrett and Caroline's cards, this dress was made with love for Britton. And when the cards, and dress, have been outgrown, they will be tucked into a special place to be pulled out years later when we all need a good dose of nostalgia. A soul-satisfying session of "remember when"...

hello shadow, nice to meet you

We went to the park on Saturday morning, as we do on most Saturday mornings. Though that morning, we all kind of needed it a little more. The past weeks of weather have been unpredictable, snow and sleet and ice and cold and we all wanted to feel some sunshine on our faces.

Walking across the field, Britton started playing with her shadow. Now, I don't know if this is the first time she has noticed her shadow, but it's the first time I noticed her noticing her shadow.





Happy Valentine's Day to my favorite shadow chaser park racer pair...

a confession

Today was my third "inclement weather" day off of work in one week. While some people may have seen it as a vacation day, I was bordering on some very cranky bad-moodiness. I've been feeling out of sorts lately, stretched too thin by the demands of work, my toddler, my family, my house - there are always chores to be done, baths to be given, commutes to be made, and it was just reaching a breaking point for me this week. Frankly, I just needed a break.

By the end of today, I was admittedly frazzled. The roads were fine by noon, but the almost-freezing temperatures and wind outside made it impossible to leave the house. I was tired - tired of the mess, tired of Britton's inability to communicate with me, tired of doing dishes, tired of the cold weather, just tired. And so after dinner I turned on the news. And Britton promptly went up to the television and turned it off. I turned it back on, she turned it back off. Again and again. And I just snapped and yelled at her. She couldn't have known it was coming - she does it all the time and the hub and I barely bat an eye (unless a game is on, though by now the hub has taken to recording any important shows just in case). I stomped out of the living room, and Britton, no doubt scared and stunned, followed me crying. And I'm not proud of what I did next, but I am honest. I ignored her. I froze her out, denied her the comfort she needed. It only lasted a minute because once I saw her tear-streaked face I grabbed her up and gave her a tight hug. And we sat on the couch and hugged just like that and I told her I was sorry for yelling, until she wanted down.

She grabbed for my hand, and I let her lead me to the guest bedroom, where she wanted to play with the night diapers on the bed. And she grabbed a couple of diapers and threw them up and laughed and I just started bawling. I tried to hold it in, but I couldn't. I was just so overcome by the guilt of being an asshole (there really isn't another wholly-descriptive term for what I was being) to my kid because of my own issues. I made her feel like she did something wrong when she didn't. I was well aware that the attitude that needed adjusting was mine, not hers, and I didn't do anything to correct myself until after I blew up at an innocent bystander.

She just looked at me crying. And you know what she did? She handed me her Winnie. Which of course made me feel like an even bigger asshole, and I started ugly crying (you know, heaving cries and red eyes and a runny nose) and she curled up next to me on the bed and hugged me. She leaned herself against me and curled into the crook of my arms and just hugged me until I stopped crying.

I've decided that I need an outlet for my bad moods. I can't always talk to my sister because she has a baby that needs her more, and my mom doesn't always turn her phone back on from vibrate and hear it ring, and I don't really have any friends here, and penting it up obviously isn't working. Starting tomorrow, I'm working out again. Blood, sweat or tears - I've got to find a release. A release that doesn't involve me becoming an angry mom.

when it rains it pours

Or, in this case snow. And ice. In Texas. But that's getting ahead of myself. On Monday night Britton started having a little cough. We thought nothing of it as this is winter and she is in daycare and colds are going to happen. Well, Tuesday God decided that the DFW metroplex was a bad pick for the Super Bowl and covered the region with a nice thick layer of ice. Work was cancelled, daycare was closed, people were crashing their cars left and right (as some genius thought that covering the roads with SAND was a solution!) and the temperature has yet to get above 28 degrees. Wednesday was basically the same day as Tuesday. Like our own little "Groundhog Day" movie on Groundhog Day (early spring, ya'll!).

Well, Thursday I'm ready to get out of the house. I was getting cabin fever and poor Britton was sick and just over the whole thing. I checked on the roads outside and then checked the laundry in the dryer. And saw this:





Don't know what that is? Well, neither did I until I investigated. SOMEONE put a purple crayon in the laundry hamper, which made its way to the washer, then to the dryer. The clothes were covered in purple spots. I can't get the stains out of the drum of the dryer.

So I give up and I go to get Britton up to get ready for daycare and she had a fever of 101.3. And a cough like a dying seal. See, the thing is, unlike West Virginia, no one in Texas is prepared to handle the adverse weather conditions well. Which meant that her pediatrician's office was closed AGAIN and the close urgent cares had waits of TWO TO THREE HOURS. So, being the over-reactor I am, I took her to the ER. Which was a ridiculous exercise in not cursing in front of my daughter because dang it all if you can salt the roads around the stupid stadium YOU CAN SALT THE ROADS AROUND A HOSPITAL!

But I digress. I get her in to see the ER doctor quickly, and he listens to me as I explain the progression, how a kid at her old daycare had RSV, and that it better not be RSV. He ordered a chest x-ray. Now, Britton didn't want to lay perfectly still on her back, and I'm not sure any toddler can. So the tech gave me the stink eye and decided we needed to use the immobilizer.

The what?

Yeah, it looks like this:




See how that kid's arms are held above his head in a ridiculously uncomfortable position? See how neither kid is crying? The device is a torture chamber. They managed to get Britton into it, her screaming the entire time, and her face kept getting caught in the plastic in the front. I stopped them right there, knowing the mental damage was creeping way too close to permanent for my liking. Finally they got their stupid x-rays by having me hold Britton to the x-ray table.

And her lungs were clear. Final diagnosis? CROUP. As in, what? I actually asked the doctor if people really still get it, and he said yes (while looking at Britton as if to say, "Of course! Because your daughter has it, dummy!). I'm not going to pretend I even knew what it was, so Dr. Sears says:

WHAT IS CROUP?
Croup is a viral infection that affects mostly younger children (under 5-6). It causes swelling in the child's vocal cords, which is what causes the barky cough. The vocal cords are already the narrowest part of the air passages, and any swelling from infection may narrow the airway enough to obstruct breathing. Croup usually lasts 5-6 days and is worse at night. The symptoms tend to peak on the second or third night. Croup may begin without warning when child suddenly sits up in bed with a barking cough. Or it may begin as a cold that gradually escalates into a croupy cough. The main concern for parents is to recognize when croup is serious and when it is not.

So we've been taking Britton on walks in the snow today to help with opening those air passages. Oh, wait. I didn't mention the snow yet?





My office was actually open today. The hub had planned on staying home with Britton because she's not allowed back to daycare until Monday (doesn't matter because they didn't open today) but a quick look outside and a quick peak at the morning news told me I was going NOWHERE. The snow was just compacting over the ice, making driving even worse than it had been before. See, unlike most people around here, I've lived places where it snowed regularly and you were still expected to go to work. But in those places, they actually salted the roads and used snow plows and the other drivers knew how to drive on it too. Not so much here.

So, we hung out all day and didn't do a whole lot of anything and even got in a nap on the couch. The last four days have felt like a week and I'll be so happy when Britton gets better, the roads are clear, and the Super Bowl is down the street and on the television.

With that in mind.....

GO STEELERS!!!

eighteen months old

Look who is officially 1.5 years old! I think after two years old you should stop referring to your kid's age in months because dang it all if I don't hate the mental math. So now, Britton is 18 months old! Her tube surgery went well and we go back to the doctor in two weeks for a follow-up to determine just how well. She's growing like a weed, as always, now in 3T clothes. And the summer stuff just came out in stores here (yeah, in the WINTER) so I'm waiting until after her 18-month pediatrician appt to get a good weight on her so I can go buy stuff. Maybe the doctor will have a good guess as to what size Britton will be come summer. Her hair is ridiculously long too, especially since other parents can't believe how old she is specifically because her hair is so long! Britton's talking has gone through the roof, with her babbling complete sentences, paragraphs even, with only her knowing what she is saying. She is saying more real words too, words we can all understand. And her eating is still good if not spotty as she would rather play than eat. And we've adjusted to it, allowing her to take her dinner to her little table and eat when the mood hits her. I still think 18 months old is too young to require her to sit at the table, napkin in her lap, while we discuss the day's current events.

She did the cutest thing too - when the hub was packing for a business trip, Britton got her little Minnie Mouse backpack and started packing it with random things in the house. Then she put her arm through the top loop and waited next to the back door ready to leave too! It was heartbreaking in that she wanted to go with the hub but couldn't, so Grandma and Grandpa booked us all a trip to Disney World in September, and Britton can pack her bag and leave with him then.

Physically, Britton is strong! She can run, go down the big slide by herself, and throw a ball. She loves tossing the beach ball around and playing tug-of-war with Sadie over Sadie's toys. Britton would spend all day outdoors if allowed! Last Saturday we went on three walks in one day, and on weekends Britton likes to go to the park. Britton can now climb the wall to her slide on her playhouse and go down the slide all by herself. And she likes opening and closing the blinds and turning the lights on and off. She is super into her toothbrush (I suspect she's hooked on that berry toothpaste) and has even tried to brush my teeth. She is starting to develop and understand her feelings, though she has been known to throw a tantrum here and there, mostly when the hub and I are incapable of reading her mind. We just let it pass and move on to another activity. But she is also very sweet and gives hugs with reckless abandon.

Likes: Bathtime, Sadie, throwing balls, Grandma and Grandpa, playing outdoors, the park, singing songs and doing the hand motions with them, putting her shoes on her and my shoes on me, watching daddy cook, all fruits, all veggies, waffles straight from the freezer, sticking her finger in her right nostril

Dislikes: Large dogs she doesn't know, being made to stay inside while the outdoors is a balmy 12 degrees, not being allowed to take markers/crayons from the table, Grandma and Grandpa leaving

fifth time's the charm

Yesterday was Britton's first day of daycare at her new daycare. This makes a total of FIVE first days of daycare, but hopefully this will be the last first day of daycare for a while! The first two times she moved daycares is because we moved and staying at the old center would be impossible. The last two moves were because the centers weren't a good fit for her. For instance, her third daycare's teacher was out sick Britton's first week, which (unbeknownst to us) meant Britton got stuck in a high chair in the infant room all day. There was no real plan in place for dealing with a teacher being out. Not cool. And this last center was mediocre, but became more and more frustrating every day. For instance, I would pick her up early and find all the teachers congregated around, chatting with each other and paying no attention to the kids. Also, the center began accepting state daycare assistance, which resulted in Britton's classmates changing on a weekly basis - not exactly consistency in my book. In addition, in the three months Britton has been attending she has brought home THREE pieces of art total - her entire day consisted of individual playtime with no real schedule. And the last straw was when she had to move rooms because her regular room was so overcome by an unknown odor that it had to be investigated. The results? A dead animal in the ceiling of her room. In a word, it sucked. But you know what doesn't suck? PIGTAILS!





Whoops, totally digressed there. So the hub and I toured some other centers and found her new daycare to be a good fit. The teachers have been there for years, the random woman I stopped in the parking lot gave it raving reviews, and it offers webcams so I can keep an eye on her during the day. I took her Monday morning, and granted she was apprehensive at first. but we charged on, and sat at the little tables for breakfast. And you know what? Britton started grinning, and TALKING very loudly at some times, and generally began to enjoy herself. I escorted her to her room and hung out while the teacher did diaper checks. Britton didn't need a new diaper, and the boys in her class started running the length of the room back and forth and giggling up a storm. And Britton joined right in. I was so proud! The teacher mentioned that they do potty training in Britton's class, but since Britton hasn't shown an interest in potty training, is unable to pull her pants up or down by herself, and does not identify her bodily functions, I told her teacher not to start with Britton and that we would let her know when Britton was ready. She told me that was fine, and just like that an open dialogue was begun.

Then it was time for circle time, and Britton sat on her shape on the carpet, and listened intently, and participated. She even stole a book from another girl, but you know what? That's what they do at that age and Britton gave the girl another book in return. The teacher and I decided that it would be a good time for me to leave as she could devote attention to Britton if she threw a fit.

And she threw a fit. But I called back later that day and they reported that Britton had done extremely well and was enjoying herself. When the hub picked her up early she was playing outside with her new class and having fun. Suffice it to say, I feel very relieved.

Now, this morning a winter storm hit the Dallas-Fort Worth metroplex, shutting down Britton's daycare and my and the hub's workplaces. And tomorrow again everything is shut down because the roads are covered in ice. You know, in West Virginia we called this a "dusting" and went about our regular day, but here nobody is used to such weather and they get on the roads and crash their sedans. At least Britton will have two days at home (nursing a cold which has sprung up) and then going back to the new daycare for only two more days of this week. It is a nice transition for her to not have to go all day for five straight days. So, I am looking forward to seeing how Britton enjoys her new daycare and new teacher and what great things she is going to get to do there.