happy 7th birthday Sadie!

Sometimes I forget Sadie's "puppyhood." I'm reminded when my sister tells me about her puppy chewing things up (I still have the Kate Spade wallet with little puppy Sadie chew marks) or her puppy not sleeping (Sadie would never nap when I needed one, and this was before children, so I really had no idea what going without sleep was all about).

It doesn't feel like seven years. We got her not two months after getting married, not one week after buying our first house. I guess she completed our idea of what married people looked like; they apparently have a dog and a mortgage! We couldn't agree on a breed - the hubs wanted a rat terrier and I wanted a golden retriever, each of us making the argument for the breed we each grew up with and never knew anything different. We compromised on a medium-sized dog that was good with kids and calm and that equation came to a Boston Terrier. And Sadie Barkington Bogle, born August 12, 2006, in Canal Fulton, Ohio or at least somewhere near it, fit the bill and that was it. We had planned on buying two girls, but there was only one girl and one boy left, and the girl was ours. She rode home in my lap for the entire trip. I held her as nervously as I would hold a newborn Britton three years later.

Good with kids? Heck yes. This dog does not bite (due to awesome training by the hubs when we were young and had the time for such things!), and she has put up with Britton way more than Britton has put up with Sadie. Who cares that Sadie refuses to walk halfway through a neighborhood walk and has to be carried when my kid can put stickers on Sadie and she won't run away? Sadie has never forgiven me for having kids and taking away her "only child" status, and we have the poop stains outside each nursery to prove it. But over time, she has begrudgingly softened up to these little creatures that want only her.

We joke that Sadie is exhausted from sleeping so much. Sometimes it seems that all she does is sleep. She burrows in her blankets, seeks out the sun, gets as comfortable as possible for her naps. It is like living with a retiree.

When I was on maternity leave, we went through a weather spell where it was thunderstorming at the same time I had to leave to pick up Britton. Sadie can't stand storms - they leave her panting and shaking and terrified. So I took her with me to pick up Britton. And these couple of days of riding along turned her into my co-pilot who was invited (and after two weeks, frankly expected it as her right) to join me for every car trip. It also served the purpose of guaranteeing that she wasn't peeing on my family room rug - the rug we have replaced three times in a year because she keeps peeing on it. Out of spite. For no reason. As long as she is in the front seat (with her blanket and the seat warmer on high), she's not peeing and pooping in my house. A win-win, really.

Happy 7th birthday, Sadie!

the VT jen quilt

I was going into my last week of maternity leave when I got this message from my friend Jen...

My first instinct was, "Yeah, totally love to except I have no idea how to do curves."  The pattern, the color combo, the vintage quilting - I knew I had to at least try because I was falling in love with this quilt.  So I did.  And then I just jumped right in, sewing for hours every day.  

I admit, I'm a lazy pinner. And this pattern - "Orange Peel" - requires a ton of pinning.  But since it was my first time trying this pattern, I made the blocks big and trimmed them down to size.  The quilt Jen sent me is by Densye Schmidt, and her pattern was for a crib-sized quilt.  I just increased the templates to 121% to end up with a bigger lap-sized quilt.

The original quilt colors were close to Hokie maroon and orange, but not exactly.  Knowing that Jen wanted this to be a Hokie quilt, I brought my Hokie car sticker into Joann and matched the colors exactly.  The names are "Claret Wine" and "Pumpkin" and the lady at the Joann cutting counter complimented me on my "beautiful autumn colors."  Ha!

For the quilting, I copied the Denyse Schmidt quilt, echoing the circles.  In the areas in the middle of the circles I free-motion quilted the diamonds that follow the curves.

I asked Jen what kind of backing she wanted since the original quilt had a hospital-green backing and I figured that wasn't her favorite.  She responded that a Hokie quilt should go all-out, so Hokie orange it was!  And Jen loved the idea of a polka dot.  As luck would have it, Denyse Schmidt designs fabrics for Joann, and this is her polka dot!

I washed it last night, making it all crinkly and cuddly and one of the softest quilts I've ever made.  I may have wrapped myself in it and laid on the couch in a half-comatose state.  But this morning, I wrapped it up and shipped it off to its new home with Jen.  Where it will get loved and used and appreciated.

Ed:   I may have had a hard time with this quilt, and many times may have gotten through it by promising myself it'd be the only time I'd ever do an Orange Peel quilt.  I made the same promises to myself after Britton was born.  But not three years after I had her, we forgot how hard it all was and were planning for a sibling.  It took less time for this!  I'm now contemplating an Orange Peel quilt in Robin's Egg Blue and dark grey.....

Barrett: 3 months old

Barrett started full-time daycare this week, and as I predicted it has been a much easier transition for him than for me!  I find myself just missing him during the day, wondering what he's doing at that time, and wishing I'd get a phone call - in short, it's like I have a crush!  Barrett has just grown into such an easy-going baby that it's not really a "break" to be away from him.  

I don't have official weight and length until his 4 month appointment, but he's easily at least 18 pounds by now.  He is in 9 month clothing and wears size 3 diapers.  He's outgrown every swaddle that is sold in the US, so now we wiggle the new swaddle (says it goes to 20 pounds, but not so much) as low as it will go on his arms (and still serve its purpose).  I added extra fabric to the bottom of his Halo swaddle, but he could still get his long arms under the swaddle portion and was pushing it up around his face.  Seeing that image on the monitor will stop your heart, so we stopped using that swaddle!

Barrett's naps in daycare were barely reaching an hour, which is no bueno in my book.  At home he'll nap 2-3 hours.  We figured that it was the crib that was throwing him off, since at home he's still in his Rock and Play.  Once the daycare started putting him down in the non-moving swing, he settled into longer naps.  As soon as he outgrows his startle reflex, about the end of this month, we will transition him to the crib without his swaddle.

We still keep his awake time between naps to no more than 1.5 hours, and watch for sleepy signs.  And lately Barrett has wanted an earlier bedtime, so it's bath at 6:40 pm, then a bottle and bedtime.  In the past two days he has shifted his middle-of-the-night feeding from 3:30 am to 12:30 am.  So he's down by 7:00 pm, up at 12:30 am to eat, then back down until 6:30 am or 7:00 am.  Once he's up in the morning, we just go ahead and get him ready for the day.

Barrett has become very interactive now.  He can belly laugh!  And he loves when I sit him on the couch facing me and I have a very animated conversation with him.  If I roll my "r"s at him, he's smiling up a storm!  And the ladies at daycare report that he loves bubbles and when they read books to him.  He's very chill now, and will lay under the playmat for 20-30 minutes so that I can make dinner and we can eat.

He's a very relaxed baby, and that's partly due to the fact that he has outgrown his gas issues.  We are still doing half Sensitive/half Alimentum, 4 ounces every 2 to 3 hours.  Sometimes before bed he wants up to 6 ounces, especially during a growth spurt.

Falling, falling, someone catch me, falling....

Likes:  "talking" with people, the playmat, music/singing, raspberries on the belly, baths

Dislikes:  being cold, gas bubbles, tummy time

birthday party time!

On Friday night, we went out to Red Robin for Britton's birthday dinner.  We wanted a restaurant that wouldn't take forever to get us food and where they would bring out a sundae and sing "Happy Birthday" to the birthday girl.  Done and done!

Then we went home and opened presents from the family!  Britton got some great gifts, and she loved just tearing into that wrapping paper.

Saturday was the party day.  We went with a rainbow/princess/Strawberry Shortcake modgepodge theme, because Britton kept changing her mind!  I figured we could either do a theme-perfect "Pinterest" party or give Britton the party she really really really wanted, and I went with the latter.   The hubs and I went out Friday night to get "a couple" of balloons, and got up-sold to two dozen balloons, and a giant Strawberry Shortcake balloon and a Disney Princesses balloon!

We woke up Saturday morning to rain.  Of course.  But we decided to trudge on as if the clouds weren't there, and we set up the outdoor activities and party tables.  Luckily, not 10 minutes before the party was set to begin, the rain stopped!  It was a little humid, yes, but at least I wouldn't have 8 kids running around my house.  The biggest hit was the rainbow Whirly lollipops!  The kids were intrigued by the ribbon dot candy, but it was the lollipops they all ran for!

We brought the Radio Flyer pony out, and the kids lined up to ride it.  And there was a constant stream of kids running back and forth between the playset and the bouncy house.  One of Britton's teachers came to the party, and the poor girl was stuck in the bouncy house all morning because the kids would not let her get out!  I admit it, the hubs and I jumped in the bouncy house when all the kids had left.  Sadly, it wore us out in two minutes flat!

The hubs grilled hamburgers and hot dogs for lunch.  Memaw and I made pasta salad, potato salad, deviled eggs, veggies and dip, chips, fruit salad, and cake pops.  The moms went crazy over the cotton candy and the rainbow sherbet punch!  It was fun having some retro throw-back treats that we all remembered but hadn't had in years.

Princess cake and princess cake plates.  Really, the theme boiled down to "saturation of color!"

I've been to a couple of parties recently where the kid didn't open his birthday gifts in front of the guests.  I get it - you don't want all the kids snatching the presents away, or you're worried your kid will be rude and say something about disliking a gift in front of the giver.  But I like to see kids opening the presents I bought them, and I want Britton to know proper etiquette when opening gifts.  So we gathered around, and this girl got some great gifts (and remembered to say thank you to each giver)!

She loved her birthday quilt!  

Yes, she's in a Belle dress.  Britton had 3 costume changes during the party!  It was a great time for all, and the whole party really flew by.  All the kids went home exhausted from the bouncy house and sticky from the cotton candy and lollipops, which I count as a successful party!

4 years old

Britton is 4 years old today!  This morning the hubs and I left out at 5:00 am to go pick up some furniture for Jessica, and we left Britton and Barrett with Memaw.  I went to give Memaw the baby monitor and Britton was snuggled in with her in the guest bed.  I didn't mean to wake Britton, but she looked at me, half-asleep, and said, "Mommy, I'm FOUR!"  I said, "Yes, yes you are!  Happy birthday!  Now go back to sleep!"

Britton wanted to stay home from school today.  We've spent the day preparing for Britton's birthday party tomorrow.  Memaw and I have been making tons of food, and the bouncy house is supposed to be delivered in less than an hour.  This evening, we'll all go out to dinner as a family and let the waiters and waitresses sing "Happy Birthday" and we'll celebrate until Barrett deems it time to get home and get to bed.  

And at some point it will hit me that I now have a four-year-old.  A four-year-old who is smart and sassy and stubborn and fiercely independent and sensitive and has her mother's need to be right and her father's need to watch "Duck Dynasty."  

brush it off

It all started out innocently enough.  Britton wanted to do some fingerpainting.  Sure, that's fine, I want to encourage creativity and all that jazz.  So I leave her side for a couple of minutes to wash some dishes, not five feet away, and return to Britton painting herself.

She explained that she needed to paint her hands in order to get handprints.  How else is she going to do handprints?  That's fine.  I warn her not to touch anything but the paper.  Not the table, not the window, not the chairs, nothing.  And then the inevitable "this is a murder scene" paint spill happens...

But I'm playing it cool because it's washable paint and it was an accidental.  We get it cleaned up, then Britton is back to painting.  Her legs.  It seems that at this point the easel next to her is simply there for decoration.

And that's how we do fingerpainting in this house!

maternity leave endeth

It's helped me out mentally to have a maternity leave that mimics a school summer vacation.  Just as I did for almost 20 years of my life, I eagerly anticipated May (in this case, not the end of school, but the end of work) and have dreaded August.  Every day of the last three months has been a countdown, one day closer to the return to work.  

I didn't go through this with Britton.  When I had Britton, I wasn't employed, and I didn't go back to working until she was five months old.  It was hard then, so hard that I vividly remember spending my entire first day staring at my iPhone, watching the video stream from her daycare room.  When my phone battery died by lunch time, I spent my lunch hour charging it back up and logging on as fast as I could. I cried all day, and every day after for at least a week.  I was certain that anything I was getting from my job (money, autonomy, identity other than "mother" and "wife") was not worth the trade off of irreversible damage I was doing by abandoning my daughter in a center where no one would take care of her to the degree that I would.  That same internal fight has waged itself within me ever since.

It doesn't help that this maternity leave has been much easier than Britton's.  I'm more comfortable, more confident, and I don't feel like I'm drowning on a daily basis.  When I was home with Britton I called the hubs regularly to beg him to come home from work early.  I cried some mornings asking him to stay home with me so I wouldn't be the only one Britton needed that day.  I stared at the clock, willing the hours to hurry up.  Not two months into it, my post-partum depression and anxiety diagnosis didn't come as a shock to anyone that knew how hard the previous two months had been for me.  But now, just over two months in Barrett's life, there's no post-partum depression, no anxiety, and no overwhelming paralyzing need to break away from my home just so I can breathe.  

Britton's teacher reported to me today that Britton was in a bad mood today, refusing to each lunch and being highly sensitive with easily hurt feelings.  Once I got her into the car I asked her what she was feeling and why her teacher would describe her like that.  "I missed you today, Mommy" was her answer.  I kept Britton in daycare while on maternity leave for two reasons:  I wanted her to stay in her routine, knowing that I'd only be out of work for 12 weeks, and also I didn't want her to be at the mercy of a newborn.  For the first 6-8 weeks, my days were filled with the need to respond to every whim of Barrett.  Some days he would eat every hour, some days he refused to nap more than 30 minutes.  I didn't want to stick Britton in front of the television for hours on end while I tended to the needs of her brother.  

August 5th.  That's my first day back.  I purposefully chose the Monday after Britton's birthday so I could spend the week before her party getting ready and cleaning the house and donating work clothes that will never fit and finally getting around to all the little errands and chores that I put off because Barrett needed to nap or Britton wanted to go on a walk.  August 5th we, my family, start all over again.  There will be another new morning routine, a new daycare room, new teachers, new day.  I will miss being home with my baby all day, but I will also miss the hugely-therapeutic "me" time I've had over the last 10 weeks.  During Barrett's naps, I've quilted and sewed, talked to my sister and mom on the phone, updated family photo albums, finished editing home videos, read books, seen movies, even taken a nap or two.  It's been selfish time and I needed it and I admit that I will miss it.  

Next week is my final week of non-work.  I know myself.  I will drag my feet.  I will put off thinking about it.  I will pretend that August 5th isn't a week away.  And then, come August 5th, I will take my babies to daycare, get back in the car, head towards work, and cry my eyes out.