read it and weep

I saw on Facebook that the hub's cousin, who had a baby around the same time as we did, attempted the "cry it out" method of getting her baby to sleep through the night. His other cousin, whose baby was born a month after Britton, previously mentioned on Facebook trying it out too. Neither made it more than a couple of minutes. And you know what? I don't blame them one bit.

When Britton was going through her colic crap, I would rock her, walk her, "shush" her, until she was fast asleep, then lay her in her crib, just for her to hit the mattress and start screaming. I was so superstitious, to the point of refusing to use a certain bottle of baby lotion because the first night I used it Britton stayed up all night. I was resentful, that my evenings were consumed with hours of trying desperately to get my baby to sleep, only to have to put myself to sleep right afterwards. I was angry that I never got any "time off," that this baby needed so much and refused to accept it from anyone else. I was tired, and after an entire of evening of coaxing a baby to sleep, on top of an entire day of feeding and nursing and playing, I didn't want anyone else, including the dog, to look at me, let alone touch me.

I bought a book - "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Baby" and I diligently read it and followed it. Until it got to the part where he says to shut the door at 6:00 p.m. and not open it until 6:00 a.m. And against our better judgment, the hub and I tried letting Britton cry it out. One night. For 10 minutes. Then we vowed never to do it again.

See, I don't know what all babies do, only mine. And Britton cries for many reasons: sleepy, hungry, needs to burp/throw up, poopy diaper, in pain. But she always cries for a reason. So when all those things are addressed, and she is still crying, what do you do? Well, I got angry, certain that there was nothing wrong and that she was just playing me for a fool. Because babies are so manipulative like that. No, Dr. Ferber and others touch on, but never give credence, to the one need some babies cry for. Comfort. And it's just as important as the feeding and the changing of the dirty diaper, and the correct room temperature. Sometimes babies just need what we call "the human touch."

So where am I going with all this? I don't really know. But I do know that we're not alone when it comes to the ins and outs of babydom, that what works for someone may not work for everyone, and that sometimes all we really need is a good night of sleep.

blasted tooth

I felt the need to get photographic evidence of the tooth Britton won't let me see, while she was eating her squash dinner. Because I'm good at timing that way. Well, I couldn't handle the camera and manipulate her mouth at the same time, so the hub took over the camera and I screamed, "There! Did you get it? Can you see the tooth in the picture?!"

And you can see the tooth in the picture (and my baby girl's beautiful big blue eyes) right above her lip. The other stuff is the bottom of her mouth, not her gums. The tooth has broken through, and it appears there may be a friend trying to come through next to it.

spring has sprung in oklahoma

Last fall my mom and I got some daffodil and tulip bulbs, which I planted in the front flower bed. Underneath Britton's window is a thick row of daffodils, and on either side are red tulips (the hub's favorite). So you can imagine my surprise when I saw that the bulbs are blooming! In West Virginia I couldn't get anything to bloom until May at the earliest. I also made another discovery, though this one not nearly so sweet. A neighborhood cat has taken to using my flower bed as its own private restroom. The mulch is thrown about, there are holes dangerously close to the bulbs I broke my back putting in, and of course, everyone's favorite, turds aplenty. Ugh. I've been putting coffee grinds out front because I read it can deter cats. If that doesn't work, the hub has always wanted a moving target for shooting practice.

Anywho, I got a catalogue in the mail this weekend and loved this wreath. $49? Not so much. Add on shipping and it's ridiculous.



So I went to Michaels (and their buy-one-get-one-free sale on silk flowers) and MADE MY OWN STINKING SPRING WREATH. And you know what? I think it turned out pretty darn good, if I do say so myself.




And here's Britton, not caring about the cat turds or wreath. Just ready for spring.

seven months old

Britton is seven months old today! She's over 19 pounds by now, eating stage 2 food twice a day as well as drinking formula, and is wearing 6-9 month and some 12 month clothing. She is a talker, though it consists mainly of shrieks and babbling to herself. She has basically outgrown the Bumbo chair and now eats in the high chair. She loves green beans, peas, carrots, squash, corn, peaches, spinach, apples, and blueberries, and has come around on the sweet potatoes. Her hair has gotten so thick and long, though there are still some random long baby hairs holding out hope. She loves daycare, and they report that she is the happiest baby they have ever had there. She got her first stomach flu today, but hopefully she'll make a quick recovery. Her first tooth has appeared on the bottom, and she gnaws on everything to make it stop hurting. The teething hasn't squashed her good mood though. She can move objects from hand to hand, and get them to her mouth with no problem. She has started throwing things and grabbing. And when sitting on my lap, she will raise herself up into a standing position. No crawling yet, but she can roll over all day long and now sleeps on her tummy.

Likes: apple butternut squash baby food, anything to do with Sadie, raspberries on her tummy, anything she can chew on, trying to feed herself her bottle, having her head scratched, shrieking back and forth with me and the hub, her exersaucer (aka "the babysitter")

Dislikes: Teething, waiting to eat, wind, cold food, being made to lie down when getting her diaper changed

party like a rock star

We got off work early today to have a party! Now, I'm not one to usually enjoy work parties. If you're thinking a stuffy conference room, potluck of crock-pots and various generic dips, and stifled conversations with the boss, you've been to a work party. Nobody is comfortable, the small talk is strained at best, and all you really want to do is put down the paper cup of rainbow sherbet punch, congratulate Earl on his retirement or Rita on the promotion (neither of whom you've ever spoken to before), and get the hell out of there.

This was not one of those parties.

Our company was named to Fortune Magazine's "100 Best Places to Work" list for the 3rd year in a row. And at our job, that means a party. It was held at the Cox Convention Center downtown, completely catered. They even had the two marks of high-end partydom: (1) ice sculptures and (2) shrimp. Not just that - the shrimp was in the ice sculptures. Of course, the hub and I had to make it an early night since Britton still required us to pick her up from daycare. But not before we picked up our party favors - complimentary bottles of champagne.

youngest mac user ever

The hub has been rendered immobile by his jacked up high ankle sprain, so while I prepared dinner he hung out with Britton. Never one to do one thing at a time, he watched the news, oversaw Britton's "naked time," and caught up on the internet chatter. Britton wanted to see what today's headlines were, and helped herself to the computer. All while peeing on the blanket. We get things done in this house.

why have kids?

Is there really a good answer to that question? Or is it so personal that the reasoning may not make sense, or be justified, to someone else? I can think of some really good reasons to not have kids. For instance:

- to have someone to love me (a favorite of thirteen-year-olds on The Maury Show)
- to make my boyfriend marry me/get a job/never break up with me/return my calls
- I'm bored
- I'm tired of working and child support would pay for a new car
- it's easier than just burning my money and crapping on my own furniture

I was thinking about it the other night, while feeding Britton her last bottle and rocking her. It's dark, quiet, the sound of ocean waves coming from the iPod, and it is above all peaceful. So my mind tends to wander because I'm not distracted by work, by the tv, by the phone, by the dog. And I started thinking about why people have children in the first place. Is it a primal instinct, to breed and populate the species? But if that were the reason, we'd be essentially picking and choosing instincts to follow. No, it can't just be instinct. Because it is expected? I can't stand behind this either, as in today's progressive world women are choosing whether or not to marry, getting higher education degrees, making more money, and enjoying more independence. There's little reason to have a child to simply fall in line. To please others? What a massive undertaking just to please another person. I would hope this wouldn't be someone's reason, as I can foresee a lot of resentment in the future of both mother and child.

So, why did I have a child? I don't know for sure. I wanted her, that much is obvious, but there was more to it than that. I wanted to see the family I chose in the child I chose to have. I wanted a second childhood, to see the world through innocent eyes. I wanted to know pregnancy, to know labor, to know birth. I wanted to experience that instinct of protecting another person with your life. Above all, I wanted to create a legacy, someone who would inevitably and hopefully survive me, who would be my witness that I was here, that I lived, that I loved, that I existed. And because I did, so did she.